Wednesday, April 11, 2012

My Life is Over... I must Die

 Primary Soul. oil on canvas. 40 x 60 inches. Spring 2012. Price: $3400
Patrick John Mills

My Life is Over... I must Die.

Last night a friend of mine explaing that my career as an artist is finished.  For years I painted tormented art work... and life was great. I was painting some really hardcore painful art.  Siegfried explained, "Patrick, your screwed!" .  I laughed.  But he made a lot of sense.  He talked about how Vincent van Gogh cut off his ear...  = great artist. 

Sad News... I am happy.  Now I wake up and I am happy.  In the morning I wake up to the sunshine. I feel sun light in my heart. I feel so happy.  I dance in the shower, Sing in the car when I drive. I can not stop myself from breaking out with a big smile.  Rather than think about death, divorce, cancer, illness, depression... Now I think about colour. My Soul. Freedom.  So my future as an artist is dead.   I am done. 

Can an artist make good work if they are not tormented?  Should I go buy a knife, start drinking, doing drugs, start thinking about faking my death. I might crash my car. Hanging out with crack heads, drinking massive amounts of beers. Piss my life away.  All this happiness is not good for my art. I must suffer. I must contemplate suicide 24 / 7.  Well more sad news.  I have never smoked, never done drugs, never even tried coffee.  I am a lame boring artist.  No future.

So I have decided to tell everyone who has purchased my art, all those people that helped, encouraged me for the last 20 years.  I am done.  I am screwed.  I am happy. I love life. I LOVE Art. And my life as a artist is in the gutter.  Sorry.  Thank you everyone for all your help.

To make matters worse.  I have been selling paintings. This week alone I sold six medium to large paintings.  I am not starving.  Life is pretty good.  I have food in my refrigerator, a house, gallery, studio... two legs, ten fingers, two ears, eyes, a heart that beats.  Life is Great. I feel great.  For the last six months I have been painting art work that is filled with joy, love, positive energy.  So my future as an artist is done. 

Life is Art.

I must Die.




Shannon Lee said...

Dear Patrick, You say you have two legs, ten
fingers, two ears, eyes,
a heart that beats...and
you forgot the most important
thing, you have a soul.

Or you can just say, you have soul.

See you tomorrow evening for Let's Talk Art.

R. said...

Title : Master of colour

Art loves life
Art loves death
Art loves all

All is to create
All is to live
All is to die
All is to love

Love in your heart
Love in your soul
Love on your palette